God Vs. Science But Why?

Vs.

But why?

 I think it is crazy for people to believe that science and God are not able to go one with the other. I don't think I would really understand how science happened and things were true without my knowledge that there is a God behind all of it. God is of order, or else he would not be a God. One of his many orders in this life, is science. Some ask: Why would there be science to make sense if there was a God? God isn't supposed to make sense? I will tell you that I do know God decides what we know and when we know it, and it is a great opportunity to know he blesses us with knowledge of something so great as the sciences.

I honestly don't know exactly what to write here. I believe in God and I think that what Einstien thought to be "cosmic awe" was instead the hands of the Lord in things he could not understand. I run into this form of "cosmic awe" every day. Why do mountains look beautiful? Why is the sound of the ocean the way it is? Why do he/she act that way when i do this? Why is my teacher asking these questions? Why do icicles look so perfect even when mishapened? Why is blue blue and green green? Why does gravity work? Why don't people trust others? why does the earth move the way it does? How have we been able to develope the way we have? why do i have to feel pain? Why do I have to struggle? why does joy feel the way it does? Why do I find it to cry so often but once I open the scriptures and read or when I pray I must always fight to not cry? I can only say one answer, the "cosmic awe" or what i know to be God is why.

Back Pain

I hate the sudden development of a pain in my back. The sudden feeling that my entire back is being pulled to one point and all movement contrary to that pull is strictly shunned and causes discomfort.
Questions that go through my head due to this pain.
Why am I so old?!!!!
Will I every be normal again?
What did I do to deserve this?
I will tell you right now that unless you did something completely stupid you probably did nothing to deserve this. You are just a very unfortunate soul like me. And no it is probably not because you are old because lets remember not all old people have back pain. And most important of all. You will probably never be normal again. The pain will eventually subside but pain scars. and it will probably haunt you for the rest of your life.
But there is hope the hauntings really are nothing except your memory.

Knowledge

I am here in Calculus and sometimes when I sit in here I wonder why I am learning this it does not seem applicable to what I will do in life. I know at the very least many people wonder this in many of the basic classes. I can tell you I have no idea what the answer is. We could say depending on your career each of the subjects is useful to an extent. I think it is important to have a basic understanding of many subjects. If we don’t have this basic understanding we will first of all be limited in where we go with our life. But also if we don’t have this understanding we won’t be able to notice and appreciate things in life. Math and science two of the hardest subjects to see how we can apply in our life, can be applied even in just the simplest of ways like costs, amount of food, people, time and the way things work in life. On a larger scale it is used in many careers. History through learning history we actually gain a greater understanding of how a culture became t the way it is today. And who doesn’t want to understand people and their cultures at least a little, you can learn a new approach, and value in life from every different culture. And people are important in life and their culture is important to them so learn it.

                One thing to keep in mind is that with knowledge comes responsibility. I think our knowledge should be used to aid others even in the simplest of things. Another responsibility of knowledge is to share not only just our knowledge but what we have gained from it, like a great appreciation for the simple things, a desire to serve, interesting concepts, human emotions, values, and character. With knowledge we must still learn to slow down and relax and spend time to ourselves and appreciate something so simple.

                People today sometimes “get too much knowledge”, not in the literal sense but figuratively. We sometimes think we know everything we need to know but I can tell you there is always something to learn. Go watch ants for a day that could be interesting, watch a child play or try to help. We are continual students of the world, people, and god. We must aim to constantly improve something. The most important thing to know is that you have more to learn.

When I am a $30 Million Dollar Man?

This is not an sort of philsophical thought or anything. I was just thinking about lists I could write if I was writing in my journal. I remembered one from my Writing class.
If you got 30 million dollars what would you do with it?
I know the classic LDS answers and my classic first answers. Tithing and Savings.
I will not only give a list with explanations but also check to see if I can even afford my desires.
- I absolutely love seeing new places I am an explorer at  heart. I will definitely invest in this interest because it is something I take seriously. I want to see the world no matter when I do it. I know I have some preferences about how I would like to go about it. Some I wont mention you can ask about those if you really are so curious but I don't know why you would. Other ways I will mention.
One place I know I wouldn't just visit is Hawaii. I would like to definitely buy a home or a condo there or get a time-share. I would also like to buy a home in Europe. Some place where travel everywhere is easy. That way I can see all the amazing things Europe has to offer. Go on adventures in Asia, Africa, and South America. Maybe even participating in charity trips and volunteering. That would be amazing, I love seeing people smile and helping with that. Sometimes it makes me sad to not see people sad but more seeing them not letting me help when I try to. But I love volunteering. I really loved special needs mutual and seminary when I did it. I think I will do some sort of volunteering with those with special needs my entire life. I will always need their loving influence in my life.
-I will definitely put money aside so my family and friends can come along on my trips, and adventures.
- I was so eager to spend my money I forgot to mention how I planned to keep the cash flow up and an income so I wont deplete my money with my silly escapades.I will do it in several ways. By the time I have any chance to gain 30 million dollars I will for sure at least be out of college so I think I would get a flexible career in my major, which will most likely be engineering. I 30 million dollars came my way I would probably do free-lance engineering  work if not I would get a job as an engineer. Maybe a little writing as a hobby, but probably not because I am not too great at it. Wow I noticed a lot of "I"s are in this. this is really weird because I feel strange talking this much about myself. Back to earning money so my fortune will continue to replenish itself. I have always know how to do physical jobs because that is what I have done since a kid. I think that no matter whether 30 mil comes my way or not I will start both a landscaping company and a Window Washing company they are both things I enjoyed doing and got good at. Of course with 30 million dollars I would be a nobody unless I invested some of it and also played a little in the stock market. They stock market and its' workings have always intrigued me. I would also buy a skydiving company, but I think this is more for my own fun than income.
- I have always wanted a not only a motorboat, and four wheelers, but also kayaks and rafting equipment. I will invest in all four of them. I will have to hire a mechanic to teach me though how to maintain my boat and four wheelers because I think I wouldn't enjoy them as much without the hard work and effort I have to put in to maintain them. The work will make it more satisfying. I will also hire a outdoors extraordinaire to help me learn the ropes of my kayaking and rafting gear so that I wont just me some wannabe.
- I love music it is a great way to express things so I have always wanted to learn an assortment of instruments even some that are only popular in random countries. So I will invest in making my collection happen and hire teachers to teach me. Some of the first instruments I think I will buy are a Ukulele(which I think I will buy very soon), a Lute, and a mandolin.
This is definitely not my whole list and and is subject to change I just know my brain forgot something.
Budgeting is where it gets fun.

Budget	Money For it	Money left
Tithing	3000000	27000000
Savings	1000000	17000000
Homes and Condos	5000000	12000000
My trips	200000	11800000
Bringing Family and friend trip budget	5800000	6000000
Business Start Costs and Investing	3000000	3000000
Instrument collection	1000000	2000000
Boat, Four Wheeler, Rafting and kayaking	1000000	1000000
		1000000 left over so save it.

It is kind of funny because i don't think money is important and I have always wanted to use it to help others. Thing is I think the most important thing to me is people. I definitely would use my money for the areas i mentioned but not to those extremes. I would probably use it to help others and in the world. And the rest for things above so I can create both large and small experiences with those I care about. 
 I did better than I thought, but of course I probably forgot something.
Sorry I bored you with myself. But I was wondering, What Would You Do With 30 Million Dollars? Share in comments.

Buddha's Introduced to Random Collection

I am sitting here definitely listening to Austin play my ukulele while I am writing my essay. He is distracting me what the heck. But that is okay because I can also read my Buddha poster. There is actually something quite interesting in it.
Siddhartha Gautama, the founder of Buddhism, said, "The whole secret to existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. only the moment you reject all help are you freed. There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth: 1.) not going all the way; and 2.) not starting." I guess we can find truth in his statement to an extent. I don't think that fear in of itself is a bad thing, and it can actually be a good thing to fear because that just shows we have a weakness and life is nothing without weaknesses to build upon. But I will agree we should not approach life with fear of what is to come of us in all aspects of our life. Someone who always worries of what is to come will never be able to absorb what is happening now and deal with it. We should make plans for our future but not dwell on it. We should live in the now with plans for the future in thought. Not live in our plans for the future with now being something we have to get through.
Also rejecting help is not always a way to be free. I know that asking for help whether with something or for someone to talk to can be very good for me to with stress and the goings of life. On the other hand we should not become dependent on others to carry us through difficult tasks as our only support but more like depend on them for an extra form of support or a willing reservoir of aid. In turn I think all of us should try to let it be known that we are there for others if they need us.
The mistakes Siddhartha stated are very true. What would life be without being willing to take a little risk and start something we might like or have an interest in. And I don't think going all the way should include success but more include putting what we believe to be a fair effort for the task at hand.
Siddhartha's thoughts and my own can be summed up in several ways I believe. I think I am going to sum it up in the main message I gathered from it. We should not fear trying new things, because if we don't ever try anything we will look back wondering where life left us in the dust. We shouldn't approach things without consideration but putting our all into worthwhile things whether for a purpose or with friends is the goal. The risks we take whether successful or fail are the things we will remember and contribute to who we become.

A Path?

Versus

The Stars are truly beautiful.The ability of something so small to shine so bright is incredible. If I was to pick why they were beautiful I it would have to be because when I look at the stars I think of the unknown, and the unfathomable ways of God.

I do remember though looking tonight at the stars while driving thinking about important life matters and riding back to BYU with Emily when I noticed there were not many noticeable stars because of the city lights. I recall a small flash of frustration with the city lights, but as I stared at the lights I realized they were also beautiful. They were not beautiful in the same way but they also were. They have more order which removes a sense of mystery that I believe people get from stars. But they lights of a city being so close allow us to see more like shadows lights bring and make adding a new level of beauty.

I would like to say that when I look at most city I get the feeling of looking at fallen stars. The taller the building of lights are fallen stars returning to the sky. 

We could definitely attach the night sky to God's presence because of it's incomprehensible beauty and God's ways are not something we fully understand. The city lights or the fallen stars are us as people. We are no longer in Gods presence some of us are closer to achieving it (lighted tall buildings) others are still working and some don't understand. But I think that like I needed to let go of my frustration and realize the beauty of the cities lights we also need to recognize that although people may not be as far along in the path to God or we ourselves are not as far along as others we need to realize that both our individual personalities and the fact that we are trying makes us great also.